a sports commentary by scott copeland entitled:


"Major League Baseball and the gigantic necklace"


what the fuck is going on with baseball players and gigantic fucking necklaces? they jog around the bases and out to their positions with huge necklaces bouncing in their faces.

they are fucking everywhere. watch 30 minutes of sportscenter and count the necklaces. lou gehrig is rolling over in his grave. cj wilson can't get a fucking out if his life depended on it, and yet he has the audacity to wear a giant wooden necklace.

one time, let me see a collision at home plate and an arm get caught in a necklace and someone get decapitated. that would be fucking priceless.

how fucking cool would you look then with your fucking necklace laying on fucking homeplate and your goddamned head rolling down the foulline.

fuck you, you goddamned primadonnas. leave your motherfucking necklaces in the lockerroom and play baseball like we are fucking paying you to do.

fuck you manny ramirez.
fuck you alex rodiguez.
fuck you jon papelbon.
fuck you cj wilson.

necklace wearing faggitts,

scott