lay all your drugs at the feet of jesus.
lay all your booze at the feet of jesus.

lay all your adultery, perversion, and pornography at the feet of jesus.
lay all your gambling, smoking, and carousing at the feet of jesus.

now, turn to your hymnals on page 7 and let's all sing, "Let's go hang out with Jesus"

pause for station identification.

"you are tuned into scott's thoughts network dot com. Coming to you with a thousand jiggywatts of raw unedited coolness per second on your cracker jack mee shack whacky whack sack. stay tuned for some more cool shit."

10 minutes of dead air.....

french toast rocks balls.

got milk.
fuck yes.

alright then.

bow your heads for the prayer.

Dear Jesus, Son of God, who is all wise and honorable and represents everything that is dignified and just, please let our beloved and righteous dallas cowboys stomp the everloving shit out of those God Damned washington redskins.

in your name i pray,

scott