sometimes when i go to take a shit, i read. and then other times i just sit there. and then there are other times when i think about how many times i've shit recently and then i examine my terds to see approximately how much weight i've lost.

i really dig it when they come out in complete hardened terd form. the kind where you don't have to wipe too much. i've been on a hot streak of those lately. i haven't had to use more than a few sheets of toilet paper on my last five shits. that is awesome.

i'm sure now that i've written about it i will have the runny shits for a week.

i like fluffy beer shits too. the kind where the shit is so light that it floats. then it just piles up on top of the water like a shit lily pad.

i'm fucking 34 years old and i still love talking about my shit.

fuck fuck fuck shit shit shit goddamn goddamn goddamn bitch bitch bitch
cunt cunt cunt cock cock cock pussy pussy pussy.

it's a triad of poetic cuss words.



39 minutes later...

scott, this is a note to yourself when you read this like you always do because you love to read your own words because you are a self obsessed egomaniac..

you are a childish immature fuckwad. quit cussing so much and try and make a point every now and then. you have become a mockery of yourself. you are a disgrace and i hate you. all you do is talk shit. do something with your life, you pathetic piece of fuck. and quit beating off so much.

16 minutes later...

i just had to go watch the end of tombstone for the 88th time.

alright then...

see ya on the outside...

willie, waylon, and me,

scott