sometimes i wonder...
sometimes i ponder...
sometimes i think...

today has been a day of wondering. i wonder a lot. i tend to think that i wonder an awful lot more than the average guy. sometimes i wish that i didn't wonder so much. i wonder about things that i have no business wondering about. things like....

i wonder who came up with the word wonder..
i wonder why they called her wonderwoman. she didn't wonder about a fucking thing.
i wonder why they didn't spell it wunder.
i wonder why i am doing this stupid ass shit right now.

most of the time i wish i didn't wonder so much. in fact, i do things to prevent myself from wondering. like drinking and watching basketball and taping porn.

which brings us to the wonderful topic of pornography....

seeing how this is sunday and another installment of the church of scott's thoughts, i figured i might make "pornography" my topic of sermonizing today.

gather round, gather round....

i was just reading the paper the other day and there was this minister who holds a men's study group and one of his members decided to send all the other members an email and admit that he is addicted to pornography. he felt that he needed to confess his sins and this confession caused the minister to feel guilty and admit that he too, was a pornography addict.

well, come to find out....almost all those motherfuckers were addicted to porn.

this led the minister to start a series of sermons at his sunday church service on pornography. he stated that he was very nervous about how the congregation would feel about it and much to his surprise, record numbers of people were turning up on sundays. so much so that they had to bring in folding chairs and shit.

i got a good chuckle out of that. i began to think that i may start going back to church.

now, i know that many women view pornography as degrading to women and i have to disagree vehemently.

the porn industry is the only industry in the world where women make more money than men. period. how is that degrading? the porn industry is the only industry that recognizes the talent of women and honors them accordingly.

now, i hope i'm not giving away too much here. but for you women who read this, if you really want to get to know your man. watch porn. lots of it. study it. examine it. embrace it. become it and watch your relationship blossom into complete harmony.

i am dr. vinny. the relationship doctor.

men spend a billion dollars a year on porn. a billion.
why do we do that?
because you won't do what the porn stars will. that's why.

now, for the record....
here are some of my favorite and least favorite porn scenes...

first off, i hate the dp.
that's double penetration for those of you who aren't in the biz.
actually, i don't particularly care for any two guy one girl scenes. one penis per scene is plenty.

however, i'm a huge fan of the two girl one guy scene.
somewhat of a double standard, you might say.
yeah.
so.
what.

secondly, i don't care for facials. i prefer my cum shots on tits. the ass, if the woman is not big breasted.

i'm a big fan of peter north and his fine work. probably the finest porn actor of our day.
i used to own a porn called "the best of peter north". absolute greatness. somebody stole that motherfucker and if i ever find out who i'm going to shoot them on sight.

jenna jamison is my favorite actress.
i also owned "the best of jenna" which was stolen as well.

jenna and peter together is just pure fucking art. tracy and hepburn don't have shit on them.

i am a fan of a good lesbian scene, but i don't really care for the strap on dildo. kinda weirds me out a little. however, a double sided dildo is a gooder and a definite scene booster.

i think maybe i've shared too much.

if you're reading this mom, i was just kidding.

i don't watch that filth.

merry christmas,

scott