you fucking retards.......

i swear to god. the minute i think i have attracted a more intelligent crowd with my incredibly witty blogging, you go and spew your manure all over my comments section. do you fucks have nothing better to do? jesus christ.

i'm just kidding. some of it kind of makes me giggle. if i really want to laugh though, i go back and read my own shit. that shit is goddamn funny.

i wanted to let you know that it is official. i have gained complete and utter control over my comments section and i have the power to ban anyone i want to and to delete any post i see as unworthy. i have told you in the past that i will not tolerate any racist bullshit. racism is the highest form of ignorance and i will not allow it on my name. okay fine.

i really do not want to enforce this newfound power and i want to let you guys say whatever the fuck you want to. i am not afraid of criticism and in fact welcome it. just watch it with the racist shit. oh, and don't call me a pedophile either.

so, last night was a great night at the wreck room. a great crowd and a very fun crowd. carl pack has taken back his shift and will be working my happy hour gig again. carl and scott together again. i love that one-legged motherfucker. he never lets me go to far out on a limb without knocking me down with one of his wisecracks. one of the best hecklers ever. he should teach some kind of a class on the art of heckling. he's one of the reasons i've worked up such air-tight stories. i had to keep reworking them until i got 'em past him. i hope you all keep coming out. they're gonna eventually have to move me to the big stage if they don't watch out.

i was sitting on the porch over at andy pate's house the other day enjoying a big fat dip of copenhagen and this cat came and sat in front of my car. it proceeded to take the biggest shit i have ever seen come out of a cat. it then covered it up with asphalt and dirt and started sniffing it. i almost threw up, but then i went out there and examined it.

i think it was some sort of a microcosm of my life. giant terds laying in the pathway of my life.

then i started thinking that god sent that cat to take a shit in front of my car because he knew i was watching. he was like, "how do you like that, scott? here's another terd for you to examine."

how about them mavericks? spanking shaq's ass all over the goddamn place. my boy dirk went off for 42 on that ass. i'm gonna go ahead and say it now. the 2004-2005 dallas mavericks, nba champions.

you heard it first, right here. sell the farm, bet the house.

well dicklicks....i think this about concludes another installment of the wonderfully popular and highly acclaimed scott's thoughts. our new website should be up here in a week or so. i hope you all dig it.

we'll be at the bronx zoo on saturday. i hope to see some new faces.

be cool like me,

scott