yeah yeah yeah....

stones blasting my ears out...
slippin' and slidin' on my worn out socks.
and the devil went down, that ain't no doubt
now he's chillin' on the beach with margarita on the rocks...

dude, i just made that up.

none of you bitches better steal that shit. i'll have my boys come over and break a few bones in your face.

probably not, though.

i apologize for not posting the last few days and especially for skipping church services sunday. i don't know if ya'll are aware of this, but at the church of scott's thoughts we only meet every once in a while. i spend a lot of my time on missions and can't be here all the time. this is when i gather information so i can come back and teach you sheep.


( fifteen minutes later, after finding my copenhagen)


some people have said that i have a messianic complex.

that is ridiculous.

i am not jesus christ.


i am king bignoggan. ruler and emperor of bignogganland, loved by all of his servants and feared and respected by his enemies throughout the countryside.


what?

yeah, that's what i thought bitch.


are you happy, now?......

....................................................................


thirty minutes later.....

i don't know what i was saying earlier, and more importantly.......i don't fucking care, either.

so there.

deal with that shit......

you heard me....

i really have nothing to say right now. what can i talk about? i was thinking about something earlier, but i forgot what it was, so i guess i can't talk about that.


30 minutes later.....


man, you guys need to get "Kris Kristofferson: The Austin Sessions". it is fucking ridiculous good. jackson browne, mark knophler, emmylou, and all kinds of fucking badasses play and sing on it.

you need to get on that shit. that is where it's at. anybody that says that kristofferson can't write a song needs to listen to that shit and then shut your goddamn piehole. you are an idiot who shouldn't be allowed above ground.

oh yeah, i remember what i was thinking earlier. i was thinking about televangelists.

here's my take on it:

"Televangelists are like fucking wild hyenas feeding off rotting corpses. they pay no taxes and they scavenger around like vultures , selling salvation to the dying for their last penny...
that's exactly who writes thousand dollar checks. old people on their last dying breath.... trying to buy their way into heaven because they're afraid that God may decide to burn them alive for eternity in hell because they didn't go to church regularly.

now, i'm not saying that i know exactly what happens when you die, but i'm betting God is probably a little cooler guy than that. that's just me, though. i'm a radical.

getting back to televangelists.....

when i watch televangelists, i watch their sermon like it is a stand up comedy routine. you should all try it sometime. it makes it a lot more fun and entertaining.

everytime i watch them, i think, "i wonder if that is how jesus preached at the sermon on the mount. all jumping around and hollerin' "amen" and "hallelujah" and shit all the time and grabbing his crotch every other sentence".

i seriously doubt it.

and he damn sure didn't marry no purple-headed make- up monster.

in my mind, jesus wasn't white trash. call me crazy.

alright then, i hope this blog is sufficient for your entertainment today.


holler at ya tomorrow....

maybe,

scott