it's sunday evening and something just bit me on the foot and it's fucking swelling up and itching like a bitch. i swear to god there's a dark gloomy black cloud that follows me wherever i go. it's amazing that i somehow have managed to make it 33 years without dying or killing someone. it did give me a good idea for the cover of my next cd, though. i'll tell you about it later......

well, the cowboys got their asses kicked all over the field and quincy carter sucked major ass just like i knew he would. he wasn't even a good college quarterback for christ's sake. i don't really give a shit though. i quit caring about the cowboys back in the 90's. they used to have heroes and athletes that kids could respect like roger staubach and drew pearson and shit. then they replaced all of those guys with fucking convicts and pimps. deion and michael irvin. deion sanders just won some kind of court case because he wasn't paying his taxes or some shit and his defense was that god told him he didn't have to, and some dumb ass jury found him not guilty. that's amazing. he showed up to court in his fucking fur coat and top hat and said god told him not to.......not guilty. what the fuck.....and how the hell does michael irvin still have a job? didn't he get caught with a hooker and crack or something. goddamn, what is going on in this motherfucker? i'm on probation for five fucking years and he's on t.v. it just ain't right..... someone please do something before i go on a killing spree.

i've got some john cougar mellencamp playing now. "i fight authority and authority always wins." word johnny. i remember when i first started playing guitar, some of my friends called me john cougar melonhead. that shit was funny. a few people have asked me where i got the nickname vinny bignoggan and i thought i might let you guys in on the secret. in college, some of my friends and i decided to have a secret mafia that really didn't do anything but sit around and drink beer and chase women, but we decided that we would all have names. anyway, my friend ryan roberts bestowed the name Vincent Bignoggan to me and forever it stuck. his name was Petey Recedie because of his hairline that was making a beeline to his behind. i forget what some of the other names were.....i don't think they were near as clever though. i think i had heard every big head joke there ever was until i met ryan roberts.
we used to go to the movies all the time and he would say, "Hey, the guy behind us told you to take your sombrero off.".... he also used to say, "you don't have a forehead, you have a fivehead." that was a good one.
he was my best friend in college and we still keep up with each other to this day. he worked for the fucking secret service for a while and now he's a district attorney in tulsa somewhere. working for the man. big time.....

he was a walk-on in college and never touched the field ever and i took it upon myself to make him feel like he was part of the team and he goes and works for the man and shit. i'm really just kidding. he and todd tolbert are probably the two funniest guys i've ever met. it's pretty hard for anyone to make me laugh other than myself and those guys did it with ease. i remember the first time i met ryan, we were in the cafeteria after practice and i was sitting across from him and i was eating a banana. i made the comment, "i love fucking bananas" and he said, "it looks like you like eating them too."..... i laughed my ass off and we've been friends ever since. he used to do this bad ass eddie van halen impression with his face. it was pretty good......we had another friend in college named bryan fugett. fugett was all of about 150 lbs. and 5 foot 5 inches tall. he was one of the toughest little motherfuckers i've ever known. we used to call him "lucky" because he looked just like that little leprechaun on the box of lucky charms cereal. that name stuck as well in the mafia. he even had a clover tattooed on his ass with lucky written on the top of it. when we really wanted to piss him off we would do that little dance and all sing, "We represent the lollipop guild, the lollipop guild, the lollipop guild, and in the name of the lollipop guild.....we welcome you to munchkin land". he looked just like one of those fuckers. we even taped that segment one time off of "the wizard of oz" and we'd play that scene all day long in the dorms. good times.....

i think ted bundy is the greatest serial killer of all-times.

well, shane brooks gave me the idea that i should get a p.o. box, so people can send me checks and cash for cd's and shirts and stuff and not have to deal with the internet and worry about getting their identities stolen. i thought i might give it a try. i'll be putting the p.o. box number on here soon and i fully expect to be retiring within the year. we'll see. i don't think half of the people who read this shit even own any of my cd's. that's fucking bullshit. i wish there was a way i could make it where you can't read my thoughts unless you own at least 50 dollars worth of my merchandise. this shit shouldn't be free.......

well, i got asked to present an award at the first annual red dirt music awards in tulsa on november 9th. i think i get a set too. i think it's bullshit that i'm presenting an award and i'm not even fucking nominated for anything. total lack of respect once again. i'll probably just show up all jaegarred up and make an ass of myself and call it good. i feel sorry for whoever wins the award i'm presenting......not really. i'll try and not be that drunk.

alright fools, i guess i better go to bed. i've gotta get up and go do some service for the community. fuckers.

okay fine whatever then.

keep it on the downlow,

scott